So tonight I was at my Grandmother’s house and my Uncle and I were going through a bunch of stuff in his filing cabinet and we found and envelope full of funny stuff that I said when I was a kid.

My mom & my uncle were talking about hair styles
Mom: I have a coupon to go a unisex …
Me: You need SEX!!!!
Monday December 5th 1983 (I was barely 3 years old)

Get me some red thread and I’ll sew up grandma’s arm – She has holes in her arm. (I am assuming freckles?)
December 19th 1984 (Just turned 4 years old)

He passed out. That guy on Mommy’s story passed out. He’s still taking drugs. He’s still taking drugs (sigh) I don’t know about that guy .. I don’t know.
Monday November 7th 1983 (Just shy of 3 years old)

I walk into the upstairs bathroom and ask “Why is the drape closed?” Meaning the shower curtain. Then I peak around the curtain and say “And nothing is even happening back there!”
Sunday January 6th 1984 (a little over 3 years old)

I think the funniest is the following conversation that I had with my uncle where I ratted out my parents (Sorry Mom & Dad!)

Sitting in the Den:
I was trying to get channel 21 on the tv so I push 2, 1 .. then I push 7, 7
Uncle: 77 isn’t a channel (No cable)
Me: No a 7 & 7 is something my Mommy & Daddy drink!
Uncle: What?!?
Me: It’s a mixed drink and you put pop in it.

Later on my Uncle tried to get me to repeat what I said to my Grandma .. My response “NO! Mommy said never to tell grandma that!”
I must have been right around 4 years old.